I went to my regular business/marketing/politics meeting today, and I talked about my current slate of plans. Everything is aligned for major action, potentially life-changing action. All I have to do is to do it.
Unfortunately, other than the meeting, I didn’t get much done today.
Five years ago, when my daughter was born, I realized that I wanted to spend as much time with her as I could—no matter what. She is amazing and wonderful and I want her to know that and I don’t want to miss a thing. I realized at the time that it might be five years until she was in kindergarten before I could give my writing long days of focus again. I hoped I could find a way to work everything in together, but that hasn’t happened. I still think it can be done, and I blame only myself, but it hasn’t happened.
However, even if I had had the time, I didn’t know what I was doing and how to do it until recently. Maybe it’s good that I wasn’t shooting off in a wrong direction. Maybe.
Now, though, I do know exactly what I need to do, and how to do it. And now there are only eight weeks left until kindergarten starts. I may not get the things I want to do done in the next fifty-six days, but they will get done.
In the meantime, I don’t feel at all guilty about stopping at the park at dusk to walk around the lake holding my daughter’s hand.